Melora's Ramblings : Cindigo- The death of Daniel.

This past week YouTube's Cindigo and Markiplier lost a member and a close friend to suicide. Simon and I didn't follow Cindigo but do Markiplier. Their loss has been felt across the community and their fans. I didn't realize just how far until we received a text message from our oldest nephew asking if we had heard about what happened. I had forgotten that my nephews follow Cindigo and Markiplier.

This is his first experience with suicide and he's going to be 13 soon. We hope that this will be his only experience with it. We had told him that we did hear and asked how he was doing. He was very honest with us in saying that he was upset and confused as to why someone would do that. He couldn't imagine walking into your friend's room to find them laying there. Why is always the question one asks after a suicide.

We were honest with him. Simon told him that it's ok to be sad. When people decide to take their own lives it is so sad because there are so many people they have who care about them, and who will be hurt by their leaving. But sometimes people become locked in their own mind and they can't see past their own sadness and own feelings of loneliness. Even when they are a famous person, it can become too much to handle. It can be worse for people who are famous for being funny, as they can become trapped by it and the pressure to be funny makes them put on a show to hide how they feel.

But when it comes to this, it's because people feel they have no one to turn to and no one who cares. But that isn't true. If someone wants to say "I want to kill myself" to a perfect stranger, chances are even that person would care and want to help.

I then expanded on what Simon said and spoke from experience. I suffer from depression. I told him that it was very sad. People that suffer from depression do become locked in their minds. I've been there. The thought is, everyone would be happier if I wasn't around. I'm a bother to everyone. To thoughts that no one likes or loves me. It's a vicious cycle that is hard to get out of. Lucky for me I reached out for help. Even now there are days when my mind goes to dark places but, Simon pulls me back.

He was surprised with what I said. Then it was my turn to be surprised and I really shouldn't be. He said that depression is one of the saddest things there is. He then told me that he continually sees kids at school with tons of scars on their arms and it makes him sad to see anyone that thinks badly of themselves. He then mentions a girl that he's friends with and she's one of those that are self cutting but she's getting help. He said that it kills him to know that he can't help them but he wants to.

I told him that he can help. He can be there for them. Tell them Good Morning and ask them how they're doing. Listen and don't judge. If you think that someone is on that brink of killing themselves, call the suicide hotline. It's 1-800-273-8255. I told him that someone is there 24/7 and they will tell him what to do to help. I also told him to give the phone number to that person. I told him again that there is always help but just know that there is only so much that you can do. If something should still happen even after trying to help, it's not your fault and you should never feel guilty.

We need to speak to our kids and give them the information that will help them reach out for help, either for themselves or for their friends. September is Suicide Prevention Month. There is so much help out there it's amazing and sad at the same time. Print out the information on a card that they can carry with them. Help is out there. Educate them on where to find it.

Need help? United States:

1 (800) 273-8255